GEMMA TIPTONvisits the Clonmel Park Hotel
WORDS CAN BE very misleading. The address of the hotel was Poppyfields, and as we turned into Poppyfields a sign read “No dogs allowed in the park” – surely enough to give you visions of blooming countryside. But the park was a large car park and Poppyfields home to SuperValu, Tubs Tiles, Boots and Harry Corry. I couldn’t really imagine any dogs wanting to hang out there for long.
The Clonmel Park Hotel itself is to the left of the retail park, off a roundabout. It was built relatively recently, and I don’t think beauty was uppermost in the mind of the architect. Inside there’s a bright and welcoming reception – and a welcoming smile, too, from the woman at the desk.
In our first-floor bedroom, were you to lie at the right angle on the bed and look up, as you peered out of the window you could see a beautiful horizon line of fields and rolling hills. But the more direct view shows a new housing estate of large detached houses, with signs of more building beside, between you and the gorgeous landscape.
We had come to Clonmel for the annual Polocrosse Ball. Again, words can be a little misleading. You might imagine the last word in decadent glamour, glamour of the kind that is rarely seen on these shores in our current financial times. Actually, it’s a roomful of people from all over Ireland who play this brilliant, fun sport – a mixture of polo, lacrosse and a little hurling thrown in, and all on horseback – dressing up, forgiving one another for any fouls or difficult defeats the season before and generally having a good time before the new season starts.
We arrived early but decided to skip the crowds watching rugby in the bar and headed to the leisure centre instead, for a swim, the logic of this being that, if we started drinking that early, we mightn’t finish the night in the style we would have wished.
A relaxing swim and bubbling jacuzzi later we were back in the room to put on party frocks. Mine, dusted down since its only previous outing, at the turn of the millennium, thankfully still fitted. Just.
Dinner was a typical hotel function-room dinner – vol au vents followed by something to do with chicken, served by friendly waiting staff. There was wine, plus prizes, dancing and a scramble for last orders before we remembered the residents’ bar.
And then, early enough (relatively speaking) for me, bed, where the hotel’s website tells you to look forward to “crisp linens”. Mine was actually the sort of knobbly kind you used to get when you visited your granny and she got out ancient sheets in honour of your stay. But it was nonetheless comfortable, and the gentle rocking motion caused by lots of wine soothed me to sleep.
It didn’t soothe me awake so well, however, and we joined a similarly pale and shaky queue for breakfast the next morning. Breakfast is served at weekends until 10.30am, so at 10.25am there was a long line of ball-goers waiting for last-minute tables.
I took time out to go over to reception to tell them our toilet wasn’t flushing and ask if they could get it fixed while we were having breakfast. Ten minutes later my friend, nipping back upstairs to fetch a hangover cure, found a man in our room turning the TV on and off. “I understand the television is flashing,” he said. He was less interested in doing anything about the toilet, and he left with vague mutterings about “housekeeping’s problem”.
It’s interesting how, with the influx of foreign staff to work in Ireland’s hospitality industry, we have forgotten that Irish staff can have their moments, too. The receptionist was Irish, as was Television Man. The woman who eventually fixed the toilet was Polish, and she did a very quick and efficient job.
Overall, Clonmel Park Hotel was an ideal spot for our ball. The location makes it easy to find, it’s relatively inexpensive (the dinner wasn’t fantastic, but that kept the price of tickets low), the decor is unexciting but fine and, despite some difficulties in making myself understood – toilet/television? – the people working there there were friendly, helpful and lovely.
When you’ve got over the disappointment that Poppyfields isn’t a field of poppies, the hotel is a grand place to have a fun night out – and in.
WhereClonmel Park Hotel, Co Tipperary, 052-88700, www.clonmelparkhotel.com.
WhatFour-star conference, leisure and spa hotel run by Brennan Hotels.
Rooms99 rooms, three suites.
Best ratesDouble room from €55pps, single from €85. Online packages include €99pps for two nights' BB plus one evening meal midweek.
Restaurant and barHoward's Restaurant, Wheat Bar.
Child-friendlinessChild-friendly leisure club, with shallow pool area.
AccessThree fully-equipped accessible bedrooms, including wheelchair shower.
AmenitiesFunction room, leisure centre with swimming pool, spa and gym. Also, Clonmel is gorgeous.